sick as a dog

So here I am reaping the benefits of a very depressing weekend. I should have known better. So, my last entry should have warned you what kind of horrible weekend I had. It doesn't end there. It seems like all weekend, I had to see pregnant women all around. Even going down in our elevator last Friday. What are the odds that I'd run into a pregnant person? What are the odds that since I was in front I wouldn't have known there was anyone pregnant had someone not said "uuy, excited na syang magka baby boy" (Ooh, you're excited to have a baby boy aren't you?). It's like a natural disaster. It keeps rolling.
We watched television at home and we were watching Mythbusters. Guess what, Kari Byron, the only girl in the cast, is pregnant. Hugely pregnant I might add and stuffing gunpowder into a cannon like it was a normal day.
So really, when I visited my son's grave, why wouldn't I end up crying my heart out?
This is the sick me talking. Neal and I weren't able to go out because I wouldn't meet his friends. Johan and Tin were meeting us and they were bringing their two kids. Their youngest is just 2 months older than Nathan. How can I meet them?
So we didn't go out and I pretty much spent the time moping.
Even shopping at Mobler doesn't help. We were there with this family, a grandmother, a husband, his son, the yaya and yes, you guessed it, the pregnant wife.
I don't even know if I'm just delusional. Maybe there really were that many pregnant people before and I never noticed them but that's not true. I notice it because of the number of friends, family and office mates that are pregnant.
Being depressed makes me vulnerable to viruses so here I am sick as a dog, at work early because I can't go on a sick leave. I have something important to do for the entire week. Actually, till Tuesday next week.
Sick as a dog. That's funny really because dogs never really show you when they're sick. They always make this huge effort to convince you that they're ok. Mainly because in the wild, they might be killed if they show weakness.
I really wish I can just disappear right now. I need the rest and frankly, my emotions need a rest too. Constant bombardment just kills me.
I'm kind of sarcastic right now, not depressed. Maybe being sick helps a little. There's no way in hell I'd want to get pregnant right now so I guess it really helps. Damn Patience. It is not a virtue.